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OH THE RESPLENDENT!
To be or not to be, it's no longer a question.
It's a choice.
Fumble, Tumble, Rumble your way through the details of everything here.
Maybe, Just Maybe, you will know who i am.

♥/ Adverts.

♥/ Speak Your Mind.
Recent Comments..
♥/ My Library..

Thanks for the memories By Ceceila Ahern
The same author that gave us P.S I love you. I hope this book is as much of a tear-jerker. =)
♥/ Looking.Back.
♠/ FLABBERGAST
designer: darkdegree
partofthecodes: detonatedlove
brushes:jc.net
images: moargh,deviantart,GG
textues: peachinparis
icons: threemoresteps
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Friday, November 20, 2009
Gone to sickland. / 8:21 PM
I feel really groggy with the cough mixture circulating in my body so i don't know how structured i can be to finish this post. I will try.
I woke up with a painful throat and constant coughing. Visited the doctor at 10am and was diagnosed with severe sore throat that caused my throat skin to be infected as well, the reason why i have this bloody taste down the throat. Now i know how blood taste like when Edward or Bella drinks blood. haha.
I practically slept the whole entire day away. I fell asleep at around 1+ then woke up at around 3. Then slept at around 4+ till 7pm. It feels good. I can tell my body love it when my voice turn from hoarse and sexy to my normal voice already.
Digress: I miss the feeling of being taken care of when you are sick. Now, i have to go back to taking care of myself. It's not that i can't, it's just that i yearn for someone to take care of me. =)
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Thursday, November 19, 2009
Battle conclusion / 11:18 PM
I'm feeling super insecure now.
My hair is really flat now (Yes, it's a initial process i have to bear with every single time i rebond my hair) and my stylist chopped away more than 3 inches of my hair this time round!! I have to agree that it's better for my hair as it will reduce hairfall but i can't help feel these little nudges in me when i look at my hair now. I'm so not used to looking at my hair with such a short length.
FL says that it's nice and looks refreshing. I think i just need more assurance. Urgh. This is so frustrating.
I think it's got to do with C's words that are constantly twirling in my head. OMG. Suddenly i wish my friend can say something nice about my hair and not be so judgemental on physical appearance. Bah!
So now, i can only secretly pray that my hair will turn out nice in a week's time to welcome my 21st birthday. My stylist forbids me to dye my hair. (Sorry C, i wouldn't be able to turn into a blond barbie doll.) He did gave in to highlights though but ask me to give my hair a break of at least 2 weeks before visiting him again.
Let me think about it alright, I'm very very broke now. yikes.
If i get sentosa cove from mac's monopoly game, I'll quit my current job, I SWEAR. Because i got to work Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday before i get my freaking off day again. All thanks to the frozen leave system which caused me to swap my shift and thus leading me to the longest working week ever in my SH history.
Let's not mention that my throat is feeling a little funny now. It's not a good sign. I'm going to start drowning myself with jia jia liang teh and plain water. Wish me luck people, that i can survived till Wednesday. =( Combat Photo that was taken after rebonding. No makeup to hide my eyebags and my flaw-full face.
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Combat mission / 12:44 AM
 Nasty Fellow, I'm finally going to spent time and money to tame you once again. That will include a sit-in session of at least 3 hours and a tormenting process of making sure that i stay sweat-free/ away from any form of water for the next 24 hours before i can wash the chemicals away. Yikes. Please be good and try to grow as slowly as possible alright. If not, i need to keep going through this entire process which is very tiring and i fear of early hair loss with all the excessive tugging and burning. So we'll see what I'll do to you. It all really depends on my stylist as well as how huge the damage will be on my pocket after that. =)
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Monday, November 16, 2009
Life is like a dream / 11:50 PM
Row Row Row Your Boat, Gently down the stream, Merrily Merrily Merrily Life is like a dream.
When you close your eyes, what do you see?
When i close mine, i see flashes of images that doesn't make any sense.
How do you feel on a chilly night?
I feel all alone and the chilly wind sinking into my bones.
How do you feel about life now?
As much as i would like it to be rosy, the truth is often ugly and be ready to face the fact that life can never be rosy and sweet.
I just want someone around me tonight. It's been a long time since I've got a hug that warms me from the heart. I can't believe that i can only rely on memories to feed me and keep me company tonight. It hurts. It hurts like mad tonight. I just want to hide under my blanket and cry all night.
Guess what, as much as i try to cry, all i get is that piercing pain in me.
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when the brain cells are dying / 11:32 AM
It probably means that you have less control on thoughts and your manner of speech.Recently or rather these few days, i can feel myself slipping off again when i speak. It might be due to sensitivity but i do felt it. I hope the other party has got use to the way i am, if not, i wouldn't really know how to react. Time to gain some control again before i do any further damage. It just seem to multiply right before my aunt's monthly visits. I call it the outburst before month end. Haha As i write all these stuff, on the bus, it seem to me that I'm directing at nothing. It's crazy isn't it, when u struggle to find a reason for things you do, things you say and it's impossible to find it sometimes. Oh god, i don't really know what I'm talking about already. This is what happens when you lost your best pair of listening ears to rant to.
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Sunday, November 15, 2009
1st Birthday present to welcome the big 21. / 12:00 AM
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Friday, November 13, 2009
Me to you. / 10:48 PM
Silly.
Hearing the laughter and seeing those expressions, it seemed to me that it's possible to defrost an ice man. They just keep replaying in my mind and i can't shake them off.
I never dared to think about anything on his darker side but it does makes me wonder, will i ever know this person thoroughly? At times, i get to see a softer side. This softer side makes him vulnerable. It surprises me on the things that were said and things that were done.
I bet it's tough to be split up into 2.
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Tuesday, November 10, 2009
I'm back! / 10:12 PM
Never felt 4 days 3 nights slipped through my fingers just like this. I still can't quite get it that I'm back in this small island and i have to go back to the same routine starting from tomorrow. Really can't don't want to get use to this idea.
The trip did temporarily curb my thirst for travelling but how long will it last, i have no idea. All i know is that I'm broke this year so no more splurging for awhile. =(
I'm not ready to write on the trip yet as i still feel a little disoriented and there are tons of photos in ling's camera as well, so I'm waiting for her to upload. I had fun, i hope she did as well. =)
I'll pause at this point. I think after sleeping tonight, everything should feel better and more realistic.
P.s: Can anyone tell me why do i feel so empty in me? It feels really awful. =( I think i look much darker now and i am suffering from a terrible sunburn on my back, just above my butt crack. I have already slapped tons of aloe Vera gel on it. Aww.
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Friday, November 06, 2009
Madness that's driving me awake now. / 11:24 PM
Quite a bit of drama happened recently. Every thing's happening too fast and I'm afraid to fall.
My goals for myself in the next 5 years is to get a place on my own and drives a car around. It might seem a little far-fetched but i know i can do it with enough effort and determination.
The only way that it's achievable is that i get out of whatever I'm doing now and start doing a prim and proper job. However, the notice period at SH is killing me slowly but surely. I hate the inflexibility of the company. I'm glad that my boss have been really understand and granted my urgent leave today but at the expense of going through 3 people to be able to get an answer is really too much. I'm really grateful for everything though but i can't help but blame on the ridge procedure. Furthermore, I'm taking a no paid leave. Even the part-timers have 14 days leave entitlement , what about me?
I'll take this few days to think about my prospects. I'll probably stick around till at least my contract ends since it's ending soon on 21st December. It's just another 1 month plus to go which is exactly around my notice period. The only reason i still have not thrown in the towel yet is really due to the people i met at work. So, if my pillar of support is not there anymore, i don't think i can stay on any longer. We'll take one step at a time but I'm very very sure that SH is not a place i can progress in. Period.
I have that motivation to keep me going already, all i need is that chance and a bit of luck. I know i can do this.
So let me get out of this world for a few days and I'll be back on Tuesday to face this messed-up place. =)
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/ The Facts. The Rubbish & The Nonsensical.
 Even I'm lost for words at times when asked to describe about myself.
Let's start with the basic then. I saw my first light as a human on 26th November 1988. And Yes, i'll stepping into official declaration of adulthood soon!
Stepping into adulthood is an out-of-the-world-Experience but i L-O-V-E it! I just hope that i remain at 21 every year though.
At this tender age i call it, i'm already roughing out on my own.
It's my life adventure. I bet i can come out with an autobiography or something.
 My dream is to travel around the world.
Leaving my mark and footsteps everywhere before i leave this dying little planet.
Pretty Cottonish Clouds never fail to bring a smile on my face as i picture all of them in different icons through my imagination
Carpe diem. Live everyday with no regrets.
Live. Love. Laugh.
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Friday, November 20, 2009
Gone to sickland. / 8:21 PM
I feel really groggy with the cough mixture circulating in my body so i don't know how structured i can be to finish this post. I will try.
I woke up with a painful throat and constant coughing. Visited the doctor at 10am and was diagnosed with severe sore throat that caused my throat skin to be infected as well, the reason why i have this bloody taste down the throat. Now i know how blood taste like when Edward or Bella drinks blood. haha.
I practically slept the whole entire day away. I fell asleep at around 1+ then woke up at around 3. Then slept at around 4+ till 7pm. It feels good. I can tell my body love it when my voice turn from hoarse and sexy to my normal voice already.
Digress: I miss the feeling of being taken care of when you are sick. Now, i have to go back to taking care of myself. It's not that i can't, it's just that i yearn for someone to take care of me. =)
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Thursday, November 19, 2009
Battle conclusion / 11:18 PM
I'm feeling super insecure now.
My hair is really flat now (Yes, it's a initial process i have to bear with every single time i rebond my hair) and my stylist chopped away more than 3 inches of my hair this time round!! I have to agree that it's better for my hair as it will reduce hairfall but i can't help feel these little nudges in me when i look at my hair now. I'm so not used to looking at my hair with such a short length.
FL says that it's nice and looks refreshing. I think i just need more assurance. Urgh. This is so frustrating.
I think it's got to do with C's words that are constantly twirling in my head. OMG. Suddenly i wish my friend can say something nice about my hair and not be so judgemental on physical appearance. Bah!
So now, i can only secretly pray that my hair will turn out nice in a week's time to welcome my 21st birthday. My stylist forbids me to dye my hair. (Sorry C, i wouldn't be able to turn into a blond barbie doll.) He did gave in to highlights though but ask me to give my hair a break of at least 2 weeks before visiting him again.
Let me think about it alright, I'm very very broke now. yikes.
If i get sentosa cove from mac's monopoly game, I'll quit my current job, I SWEAR. Because i got to work Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday before i get my freaking off day again. All thanks to the frozen leave system which caused me to swap my shift and thus leading me to the longest working week ever in my SH history.
Let's not mention that my throat is feeling a little funny now. It's not a good sign. I'm going to start drowning myself with jia jia liang teh and plain water. Wish me luck people, that i can survived till Wednesday. =( Combat Photo that was taken after rebonding. No makeup to hide my eyebags and my flaw-full face.
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Combat mission / 12:44 AM
 Nasty Fellow, I'm finally going to spent time and money to tame you once again. That will include a sit-in session of at least 3 hours and a tormenting process of making sure that i stay sweat-free/ away from any form of water for the next 24 hours before i can wash the chemicals away. Yikes. Please be good and try to grow as slowly as possible alright. If not, i need to keep going through this entire process which is very tiring and i fear of early hair loss with all the excessive tugging and burning. So we'll see what I'll do to you. It all really depends on my stylist as well as how huge the damage will be on my pocket after that. =)
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Monday, November 16, 2009
Life is like a dream / 11:50 PM
Row Row Row Your Boat, Gently down the stream, Merrily Merrily Merrily Life is like a dream.
When you close your eyes, what do you see?
When i close mine, i see flashes of images that doesn't make any sense.
How do you feel on a chilly night?
I feel all alone and the chilly wind sinking into my bones.
How do you feel about life now?
As much as i would like it to be rosy, the truth is often ugly and be ready to face the fact that life can never be rosy and sweet.
I just want someone around me tonight. It's been a long time since I've got a hug that warms me from the heart. I can't believe that i can only rely on memories to feed me and keep me company tonight. It hurts. It hurts like mad tonight. I just want to hide under my blanket and cry all night.
Guess what, as much as i try to cry, all i get is that piercing pain in me.
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when the brain cells are dying / 11:32 AM
It probably means that you have less control on thoughts and your manner of speech.Recently or rather these few days, i can feel myself slipping off again when i speak. It might be due to sensitivity but i do felt it. I hope the other party has got use to the way i am, if not, i wouldn't really know how to react. Time to gain some control again before i do any further damage. It just seem to multiply right before my aunt's monthly visits. I call it the outburst before month end. Haha As i write all these stuff, on the bus, it seem to me that I'm directing at nothing. It's crazy isn't it, when u struggle to find a reason for things you do, things you say and it's impossible to find it sometimes. Oh god, i don't really know what I'm talking about already. This is what happens when you lost your best pair of listening ears to rant to.
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Sunday, November 15, 2009
1st Birthday present to welcome the big 21. / 12:00 AM
Friday, November 13, 2009
Me to you. / 10:48 PM
Silly.
Hearing the laughter and seeing those expressions, it seemed to me that it's possible to defrost an ice man. They just keep replaying in my mind and i can't shake them off.
I never dared to think about anything on his darker side but it does makes me wonder, will i ever know this person thoroughly? At times, i get to see a softer side. This softer side makes him vulnerable. It surprises me on the things that were said and things that were done.
I bet it's tough to be split up into 2.
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Tuesday, November 10, 2009
I'm back! / 10:12 PM
Never felt 4 days 3 nights slipped through my fingers just like this. I still can't quite get it that I'm back in this small island and i have to go back to the same routine starting from tomorrow. Really can't don't want to get use to this idea.
The trip did temporarily curb my thirst for travelling but how long will it last, i have no idea. All i know is that I'm broke this year so no more splurging for awhile. =(
I'm not ready to write on the trip yet as i still feel a little disoriented and there are tons of photos in ling's camera as well, so I'm waiting for her to upload. I had fun, i hope she did as well. =)
I'll pause at this point. I think after sleeping tonight, everything should feel better and more realistic.
P.s: Can anyone tell me why do i feel so empty in me? It feels really awful. =( I think i look much darker now and i am suffering from a terrible sunburn on my back, just above my butt crack. I have already slapped tons of aloe Vera gel on it. Aww.
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Friday, November 06, 2009
Madness that's driving me awake now. / 11:24 PM
Quite a bit of drama happened recently. Every thing's happening too fast and I'm afraid to fall.
My goals for myself in the next 5 years is to get a place on my own and drives a car around. It might seem a little far-fetched but i know i can do it with enough effort and determination.
The only way that it's achievable is that i get out of whatever I'm doing now and start doing a prim and proper job. However, the notice period at SH is killing me slowly but surely. I hate the inflexibility of the company. I'm glad that my boss have been really understand and granted my urgent leave today but at the expense of going through 3 people to be able to get an answer is really too much. I'm really grateful for everything though but i can't help but blame on the ridge procedure. Furthermore, I'm taking a no paid leave. Even the part-timers have 14 days leave entitlement , what about me?
I'll take this few days to think about my prospects. I'll probably stick around till at least my contract ends since it's ending soon on 21st December. It's just another 1 month plus to go which is exactly around my notice period. The only reason i still have not thrown in the towel yet is really due to the people i met at work. So, if my pillar of support is not there anymore, i don't think i can stay on any longer. We'll take one step at a time but I'm very very sure that SH is not a place i can progress in. Period.
I have that motivation to keep me going already, all i need is that chance and a bit of luck. I know i can do this.
So let me get out of this world for a few days and I'll be back on Tuesday to face this messed-up place. =)
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